Apparently, US chapters of a group called "No Kidding" have increased from 2 to 47 over the past five years. These people express a backlash against children, objecting to the noise, disruption, and inconvenience that children bring to their lives. They feel work place pressure because colleagues with young children get leaves and flexible hours. And they object to paying taxes to support other people's children. Describing themselves as "child-free," some use offensive language to express their views, calling parents "breeders"; children "brats" and "sprogs"; and neighbourhoods with families "child-infested." I can sympathize with aspects of the "child-free" view of life and the world. If you don't want to have children, your mother shouldn't nag you to make her a grandmother, and your friends shouldn't hassle you abut your choice. Nor should doctors subject you to paternalistic lectures if you choose sterilization. It's easy to agree as well, that there are some times and places---expensive restaurants and operatic performances come to mind---where young children should not be. But these people are missing something big. I'm not saying they are missing big experiences in life---pregnancy, birth, the first tooth, the toddler's breathless wonder at bugs and leaves, bed-time stories, the imaginative charm of early drawings, the first day at school, the charming passion of early friendships, the teenage confidences, the high school grad
I'm glad I was lucky enough to have these experiences. But whether others choose to have them is their business, not mine. When I say this backlash movement misses something big, I mean something else. These people are making a fundamental mistake abut society itself. Society is spread over time and requires more than one generation. We just won't have a society unless some people have and raise children. We won't have a social world unless some people get pregnant and give birth, and they---many others---go on to love, care for, and educate children. Having children is not a matter of egoistic self-indulgence, but rather a condition of life itself. In the Middle Ages, fervent Christians thought celibacy a virtue. But the strange consequence of this view is that if everyone practiced this "virtue" there would be no society at all. The nineteenth century Shaker sect disappeared for this reason. It survives in hymns like "It's a gift to be simple"---now often sung by choirs of non-Shaker children. Because society needs children, some sharing of the work and costs of raising and educating them is perfectly reasonable. If nobody has children, thirty or forty years from now, there will be no one to provide medical and dental care, hospitals, roads---or even opera and restaurants---for aging people, including those who now label themselves "child-free." In fact, those people owe a big debt to parents. Some day they are going to need the work and services of these children whose rearing takes so much love and energy and plain hard work. I promise not to bore you with stories about my children or grandchildren. But please respect parents for their hard work---and please understand that children are necessary for life itself.
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You are missing an all too important point. Society only needs children to perpetuate its own self. If all humans became child-free starting tomorrow, once humanity died out it would actually be a good thing for the earth. From the standpoint of a humans individual survival a child is only a vanity item. I am a child-free person. I only complain about the same people you would be complaining about. You know the kid you do not want your kid picking up habits from? I am willing to bet that not so much as one child-free person has ever told you; "your lifestyle is unacceptable", "you should have never been a parent", or gossiped about the fact that you have a child. Child-free people have to put up with that every day. I had a vasectomy when I was 21, then I went into the military. They could not understand how a man could have sought a vasectomy, yet never had children. I was investigated for being a homosexual. I was forced to work all the holidays while all the people with kids enjoyed the time off. I guess I was being punished for not having them, right? That was back in the late 80's. No parent will ever have to live with the sort of treatment.
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Help evaluating an argument...PLEASE?
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Posted by
Bobby vaizZ
at
5:15 AM
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